{"id":81,"date":"2007-02-12T04:22:44","date_gmt":"2007-02-12T04:22:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/2007\/02\/12\/random-web-junk\/"},"modified":"2007-02-12T04:22:44","modified_gmt":"2007-02-12T04:22:44","slug":"random-web-junk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/2007\/02\/12\/random-web-junk\/","title":{"rendered":"Random web junk"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><object width=\"425\" height=\"344\"><param name=\"movie\" value=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/FLn45-7Pn2Y&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1\"><\/param><param name=\"allowFullScreen\" value=\"true\"><\/param><param name=\"allowscriptaccess\" value=\"always\"><\/param><embed src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/FLn45-7Pn2Y&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1\" type=\"application\/x-shockwave-flash\" allowscriptaccess=\"always\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" width=\"425\" height=\"344\"><\/embed><\/object><br \/>\nAn amusing video and two jokes from my mother-in-law:<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;I THINK YOU&#8217;RE THE FATHER OF ONE OF MY KIDS&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>A guy goes to the supermarket and notices a beautiful blond woman wave at him and say hello.<\/p>\n<p>He&#8217;s rather taken aback, because he can&#8217;t place where he knows her from. So he says, &#8220;Do you know me?&#8221;  To which she replies, &#8220;I think you&#8217;re the father of one of my kids.&#8221; <\/p>\n<p>Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, &#8220;My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I laid on the pool table with all my buddies watching, while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery???&#8221; <\/p>\n<p>She looks into his eyes and calmly says, &#8220;No, I&#8217;m your son&#8217;s math teacher.&#8221; <\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Redneck Sensitivity&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Three Rednecks were working on a cell phone tower&#8230; Cooter, Jim Bob, and Bubba.<\/p>\n<p>As they start their descent down the tower, Cooter slips, falls off the tower and is killed instantly. As the ambulance takes the body away, Jim Bob says, &#8220;Well, damn, someone should go and tell his wife.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Bubba says, &#8220;OK, I&#8217;m pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I&#8217;ll do it.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of Budweiser.<\/p>\n<p>Jim Bob says, &#8220;Where did you get that beer, Bubba?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Cooter&#8217;s wife gave it to me,&#8221; Bubba replies.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;That&#8217;s unbelievable; you told the lady her husband was dead and She gave you beer?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Well, not exactly&#8221;, Bubba says. &#8220;When she answered the door, I said To, &#8216;You must be Cooter&#8217;s widow&#8217;.&#8221; She said, &#8220;You must be mistaken, I&#8217;m not a widow.&#8221;&#8230; then I Said &#8220;I&#8217;ll bet you a case of Budweiser you are.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Rednecks Are Good At Sensitive Stuff<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>An amusing video and two jokes from my mother-in-law: &#8220;I THINK YOU&#8217;RE THE FATHER OF ONE OF MY KIDS&#8221; A guy goes to the supermarket and notices a beautiful blond woman wave at him and say hello. He&#8217;s rather taken aback, because he can&#8217;t place where he knows her from. So he says, &#8220;Do you [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-81","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=81"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=81"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=81"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=81"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}