o—————————————–o
\n| “My wife uses fabric softener.\u00c2\u00a0 I never |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 knew what that stuff was for.\u00c2\u00a0 Then I\u00c2\u00a0 |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 noticed women were coming up to me\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 (sniff) ‘Married’ (walk off).\u00c2\u00a0 That’s\u00c2\u00a0 |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 how they mark their territory.\u00c2\u00a0 You\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 can take off that ring, but it’s hard\u00c2\u00a0 |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 to get that April fresh scent out of\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 your clothes.”\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 — Unknown\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 |
\no—————————————–o<\/p>\n
o—————————————–o
\n| “Women might be able to fake orgasms,\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 but men can fake whole relationships.” |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 — Jimmy Shubert\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 |
\no—————————————–o<\/p>\n
o—————————————–o
\n| “I think a good name for a horror movie |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 would be, ‘The Bitchening.’\u00c2\u00a0 I’m not\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 sure what the monster would look like, |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 but I bet it would act a lot like my\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 ex-wife.”\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 |
\n|\u00c2\u00a0 — Wes Nessmann\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 |
\no—————————————–o<\/p>\n
Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that
\nreckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away someone
\nelse’s cash.
\n— P.G. Wodehouse, “Louder and Funnier”<\/p>\n
WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.<\/p>\n
I need someone real bad… Are you real bad?<\/p>\n
All men are idiots… and I married their king.<\/p>\n
My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her…or something like that.<\/p>\n
If sex is a pain in the ass, then you’re doing it wrong…<\/p>\n
Don’t Be Sexist – Broads Hate That.<\/p>\n
To all you virgins: Thanks for nothing.<\/p>\n
If You Don’t Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut.<\/p>\n
Impotence: Nature’s Way Of Saying “No Hard Feelings.”<\/p>\n
I wasn’t born a bitch.\u00c2\u00a0 Men like you made me this way.<\/p>\n
Who lit the fuse on your tampon?<\/p>\n
So you’re a feminist…Isn’t that cute.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
o—————————————–o | “My wife uses fabric softener.\u00c2\u00a0 I never | |\u00c2\u00a0 knew what that stuff was for.\u00c2\u00a0 Then I\u00c2\u00a0 | |\u00c2\u00a0 noticed women were coming up to me\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 | |\u00c2\u00a0 (sniff) ‘Married’ (walk off).\u00c2\u00a0 That’s\u00c2\u00a0 | |\u00c2\u00a0 how they mark their territory.\u00c2\u00a0 You\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 | |\u00c2\u00a0 can take off that ring, but it’s hard\u00c2\u00a0 | |\u00c2\u00a0 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":71,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-78","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/78","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=78"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/78\/revisions"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/71"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/trentdouthat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=78"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}